Graham Clifford's latest VFTS rescues Moletown from oblivion, tracks Jack Straw's career and calls Phillipa Stroud a homophobic old trout!

Biography: Graham is the sports editor of the Irish Post newspaper in London and has been a broadcast and print journalist for the last eight years working in the U.K., Australia and in his native Ireland. He presents a show on local BBC radio in the South East of England and claims to have Psychic powers. He once caught a falling star and glued it back in space again and is in line to become the official starter of the Aintree Grand National in 2010! 

Straw to mimic Blair in attempt to sort out major international dispute 
Yes just weeks after announcing he would be removing himself from the centre of British Politics former Foreign secretary Jack Straw is about to embark on a new exciting mission. Unsure which road to travel following his announcement the Member of Parliament for Blackburn turned to the great owners of raceclubs for guidance. And a suggestion from new owner Murray Mint has gone down well in the corridors of power. Now that Notts County are climbing the football league ladder there’s genuine concern that in the not too distant future they and fierce rivals Nottingham Forrest could find themselves back in the same football division. In a bid to calm the waters ahead of this happening Jack Straw will (in Murray Mint’s words) “follow in Tony Blair's footsteps and become a special envoy to the East Midlands.” For your very helpful suggestion MM you win this week’s £10 in bonus credits.

Worldwide search for Lee ends 
Police in sixteen countries from Canada to Cambodia have called off a major search and rescue operation for Raceclubs owner and scribe Lee from the Moletown stable. When Lee’s insightful race previews, reviews and analytical articles stopped many in the game reported him missing. Police were thrown off the scent by Bonnybrook Farm after they wrote “The course caretaker tells me Raceclubs has sent him on a speaking tour for PR: Boston, New York, Cincinatti, Chicago, Moscow, Tokyo...etc. etc. Back at Christmas. “. Bonnybrook was taken into custody and charged with wasting police time. While Lee can indeed speak Russian and Japanese a close friend said he has a distinct dislike for both vodka and sushi! Hours of waiting for info on Lee’s whereabouts turned into days. There were rumored sightings in Dundee, Newry and Truro but all proved to be false. But then at 8.08pm on Tuesday, August 31 the message everyone had waited for came through. Lee wrote “I was just having a fortnight away whilst I did some home DIY! Check out the articles forum, I'm back and things will be bigger than ever. Hope you didn't get too many withdrawal symptoms!.” New shelves, a cut lawn and a fresh coat of paint in the kitchen then were to blame then for Lee’s absence. Can’t wait for the new articles Moletown.

How ironic? The two sides of Arsenal! 
Arsene Wegner is usually criticized for not buying enough players but Keith from the Gogogunner yard is criticized for snapping up too many charges! 
Making his mark 
Just a word to congratulate the Johnnymark yard for flying past the 1000 (rated and above) wins mark. This stable has over the last four and a half years shown itself to be one of the best in the business. Still though it must yearn for success in a challenge race. After 10 attempts Jonnymark horses are yet to win or place. Fingers crossed that statistic is rectified this season.

Oh William, what have you done? 
I don’t know if there’s anyone on this earth I feel less like than William Hague…and that was even before the recent revelations that he shared a hotel room with his adviser Christopher Myers. In 2003 he rubbed me up the wrong way (behave yourself) when he made anti-Irish jokes at a business dinner in London so that saw him drooped from my Christmas card list immediately. Still though I have a smidge of sympathy for him now. Hague of course went public about the whole ordeal after the rumours of his “night of gay passion” were dotted on various internet sites. One blog I saw today said “Hague has been notorious for his objection to legislation promoting gay rights as well as publicly supporting the homophobic old trout Phillipa Stroud who has a history of attempting to ‘cure’ people of their homosexuality. Whether Stroud has managed to cure Hague, and exactly how she went about it, are so far unclear. We cannot make any comment on these lurid allegations but reckon if true then Hague should swallow any thoughts of legal threats and stand up and take it like a man.” Oh my.

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